I rarely get angry. I very rarely get angry that doesn't go away with a few deep breaths and some physical space between me and whatever. The one exception? My kids. The momma bear in me isn't buried very deep. I also fully believe that before I get offended over something, the person doing/saying/whatevering should be notified that what they are doing is not okay in my world.
Conversation today with a near stranger {I had no idea they had any idea about my situation, they surely don't know me very well}
Stranger: "It won't be easy finding someone willing to take you with your [pause] baggage"
Me: Jaw dropping stare and deathly silence.
Stranger: "It's not like that, it's just that societ..."
Me: "My kids are NOT baggage"
Stranger: "I didn't mean it like that, it's just a common way..."
Me: "I don't care how common it is, you should shut up now if you are only going to defend yourself"
Stranger: "but..."
Me: Turned and walked away
Argh!!!! I've never liked the comment, and the past couple of years it hits a sore spot with me even when not being used in reference to us. Use it referring to us makes any rules I like to play by about being nice, benefit of the doubt, fair warning fly out the window.
I know single never been married people with a lot more baggage than a visible ex-spouse and/or kids. There are always things that will make any relationship difficult, some bigger than others. Yes, kids change things and some people aren't willing to deal with step-kids -- that's their choice and I'm not going to try to convince anyone that they should. My kids are not baggage. No one kids should be viewed as baggage. Ever.
I also don't want someone who is willing to take me. Could it be possible to work anymore offense into that one little sentence? How can someone know that much about my life and know me so little that they think anything along those lines would be acceptable?!?!?
And it's dark and I can't go smack some softballs to cool off.
Bah! Stupid people suck. I wish I didn't let them get to me.
Been there done that Heather. When I was single, I let everyone know up front that I am a package deal with my kids. Even now, dealing with people outside my family My kids and I are a package deal. I actually walked home from a "date" with a guy who got angry that my 2 year old didnt eat alllll the food that he was paying for her to eat, and was also angry that my 5 year old spoke with out being recognized at the dinner table. Yep, we are done with THAT date.
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