Softball and numb fingers

I set this blog up initially while I was newly post op from my elbow surgery and then let it sit while I couldn't do anything but sit and try to heal. I couldn't easily write and typing would have been completely 1 handed. Last summer was very difficult on all of us. Charlet took care of the house, did most if the cooking and laundry. Anytime I tried to do anything it was too much. By far the hardest 4 months of recent history. 

I went back to work first part of August, well I clocked in for 60 minutes of education on July 31.  

Tonight church ball started. Last year I worried about my arm, either stopping a line drive or batting but I was fine!  Woohoo!!  I even did a little happy dance.   Incredibly out of shape and the arm was weak from non-use but I could play softball!  Yes it's worth exclamation abuse, not being able to play ball or go rappelling was what had me starting to look at what needed to be done to fix it. 

Tonight I realized how out of shape I am and that my right arm is having problems too. Every single time I'd throw zingers would shoot down my arm and my hand was numb most of the game. There were a few wild throws while I was warming up with Ron too.

*sigh*

I'm sitting here with ice on my elbow finally able feel my fingers and cycling through how frequently I wake up to pain in my hand, when I dropped myself the last time I went rappelling because my right hand is my brake. 

I can't just not work for 4 months again, I can't expect Charlet to shoulder the extra responsibility, I just can't do it. 

I don't know if playing ball will make it worse or not, guess its time to talk to my ortho and see if its tolerable {pain is, my throws were not} if I'm doing further damage. If not I will keep playing but if it does more damage I need to put off what seems like the inevitable for as long as possible. 

If I can fix a swamp cooler, I can do this too--right?

{Heather}

PS:  school craziness has officially begun, this is how our summer ended this morning. 

Faith on the Softball field

Before I begin this is the second time I've typed this up, phone posting even!  Grrrr!!

I played city league co-Ed softball tonight, first time I've played anything besides church ball in over a decade. Don't get me wrong, church ball is awesome its just a bit different. 

Main lesson I learned tonight is if you don't use it you lose it. My throwing arm?  It's gone, a distant memory I'm now wondering how much of it was a little enhanced since I was 20. I can consistently connect with the ball, it just doesn't go as far as I'd like and my rough ability to place the ball is now tied up in theory and physics lessons. I didn't get a chance to test my ability to field a fly ball but the test will come, hopefully with a little more skill. I won't even discuss my inability to run the bases. I was never a wonderful softball player earning scholarships to wherever I wanted to go with loyal fans besides Mom but I love the game, tried my best {usually}, was dedicated and loyal to the team and I consistently improved until I stopped playing. 

If you don't use it you lose it applies to far more than softball skills. Math {have you tried to help with high school math homework recently?  Nothing us even named the same!} to gardening and faith. 

Over the last few years I've learned that faith is a verb, and as a verb if you don't use that skill set it can atrophy the same way my softball skills have. 

It's a different skill set, this one consists of regularly studying the scriptures. Not just reading a chapter a night, but contemplating the words and taking it beyond the stories and personalizing the messages. I'm not knocking the chapter a night, that's what we do as a family. I just need more. Praying not just out of habit before crawling into bed but praying like Enos. Attending meetings not just physically but with heart and mind.  Gratitude, service, and humility have become my trifecta for strengthening my faith when things are difficult. 

With regular use the faith skill set can become a strong foundation able to withstand the trials and darkness that will come. There has been a lot of discussion lately about only needing a twig of faith to act on.  Today I have that twig. 

I don't know how but I do know that everything will be okay -- eventually. I can't let myself focus on the how because there is no answer for that right now. It's not going to be easy and there may be times I wish I could give up but we will be okay.