Are you happy?

I'm going to preface this in a way that makes me grateful that my English teachers and/or debate teachers aren't likely to be reading this because I can see my grade dropping regardless of the wonderful content that could potentially follow.  I've had a lot of thoughts on happiness floating around in my head the past month with increasing frequency but my thoughts aren't forming nice words let alone sentences or complete blog posts so be prepared for the brainstorming version.  I'm also beat after a long night at work and that doesn't help so please try to ignore my rambling.

There are people that I know that I've intentionally gotten to know better simply because they seem happy.  They have an infectious smile, a sense of peace, or their eyes always have that happy twinkle in them.  I enjoy being around them and find myself feeling happier just because I had the opportunity to spend some time with them even if it's as brief as chatting in the grocery store line.

There is a point in my life that I was jealous of them, I wanted their life.  Obviously, if they are that happy nearly all the time their life must be better than mine.  Right?  I know that some areas that I was really struggling with they were not and they were always happy.  Their life is definitely better than mine.  Right?

Wrong.

As I've gotten to know a couple of these individuals better I learned that their life isn't without struggles, they are lonely sometimes, sunshine doesn't always fall before their feet, and just maybe their wonderful teenagers behave like teenagers.  They are happy because that is simply who they are.  Their happiness isn't conditional on life letting you take the easy road and in fact I'm willing to bet that they are happier because of their trials, stresses, hardships, {whatever label makes you happy will work}  Happiness is not dependent on a perfect life free from conflict and stress.

Okay, great!  I can be happy!  I can do happy, I quite enjoy being happy in fact.

Until Mom Guilt shows up at least.  How dare I be happy when things aren't perfect for my kids.  They don't have fresh baked bread, the soup in the crock pot is cheater soup, I can't buy every gadget and gizmo they want, and there is always a list of things that must be done that is never done.  The audacity of me being happy in the face of all that?!?

Wrong again.

If I manage to teach my kids how to find happiness in the mist of whatever life throws at them I will consider that a success.  In Finding Peace, Joy, and Happiness there is a quote I'd like to find about happiness that I am willing to attempt to paraphrase because you know as well as I do that I'm not actually going to come back and fill it in no matter how great my intentions are.  Richard G. Scott says that happiness is rooted in obedience.  It's not in the flashy fun things of the world that disappear quickly but true lasting happiness is found in obedience.  Gospel teachings aside, I think there is an important difference for everyone regardless of religious beliefs between fun and happy. If I'm given the choice I'll choose happy.  Dirty dishes, piles of bills, homework, kid shuffling, loneliness and all -- I choose happy.